Thursday, April 02, 2009

Cameltoe Adventure*

Tonight after work, I went to my student's (I tutor a 7 year old) t-ball game. I've never been to a t-ball game before. It's kind of odd, how they play.

Anyhow, that's not the primary subject here. Let's talk cameltoe and awkward moments, k?

I'm sitting on the bench, rooting for the kiddos, and look up to view the most incredible cameltoe I've ever seen. The lady is wearing tight purple jeans, walking past the bleachers toward the bathroom.

I immediately update my Facebook status to reflect what I've just witnessed and I begin to plan my photo-snap to capture the amazing sight. I mean- EPIC cameltoe. Can't pass up the chance to share this, I think.

She exits the bathroom, on the way back to her chair on the other side of the t-ball field, and I position my iPhone just-so... it looks like I'm either texting or snapping pics of the field.

Just as she passes in front of me, I click. AND SHE STOPS DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF ME. SHE'S TALKING TO ME.

I think- ohfuckIjustgotcaughttakingpicsofhercameltoe.

But no- she asks: Do you work at (company I work at)?
Oh. Phew. I'm wearing a jacket with the company logo.
Yes, I say.
Oh! I work there too, she says. In (department that I know people in).
I say, so you work with (guy who runs her department)?
Yeah, she says. I'm his secretary.
Oh, I used to work with him...
uncomfortable pause....
Well, it's nice to meet you, I say.
She agrees and departs.

I release my breath and re-update my facebook status.
Mr. Grant Miller calls me a tease for not sharing the picture and Catherinette says she "likes this" status. My cousin laughs...

I looked at the picture with my student's mom and we realize the cameltoe was not captured, but you can see in the photo that she is coming directly AT me.

So here, I'm no tease and I totally planned on sharing this with y'all anyway. After all, you don't know her... Right?


*I can only imagine the kind of traffic that I'll get from keyword searches with a title like that.

17 comments:

O.G. said...

Hi, I found you through my google search for purple jeaned cameltoe. Next time can you please try to get a better angle?

Will this end up getting around the office?

A said...

It looks like she's pointing at her cameltoe in the picture actually, doesn't it?

Anonymous said...

Only you, my Dahlin', could attend a sporting even and come back with that story. I applaud you. I would have blogged about the kid who fell on his face or something like that...

A's right, it does look like that. Funny how the universe works...

*kisses*
ii

TC said...

Oh man, I'm glad I wasn't the one with this experience.

Bob Dobalina said...

She's coming right at you! She's hungry! RUN!

NWO said...

I really prefer the vision I had in my head before actually seeing the photo! But what a scary moment in photography!

sista #2 said...

She be sporting those purple jeans!!! Which BTW she has no business wearing.

I would have thought I was sooo busted. Good shot anyway!!!

peace
#2

The Ambiguous Blob said...

OG, I just KNEW I'd get some crazies here from this post.

A, It does, now that you mention it. Awkward.

externalappearance, I just couldn't believe that was happening.

TC, It could have been worse. She could have actually known I was taking a pic of her cameltoe.

BobD, Have you seen me run?

NWO, Cameltoes are never pretty. Not to me anyway. Although with your mad photo-skillz, you might be able to pull off a hottie pic of one.

sista, I so DID think I was busted!

Tee aka The Diva's Thoughts said...

Yeah, I would have freaked out too thinking she caught me taking that picture. It's a shame that it wasn't a better pic but that story is funny as all get out! lol

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

Bah, Cameltoe has nothing on its nasty cousin, Moose Knuckle.

Bob Dobalina said...

I have seen you run Tabs.. as I recall it involved "RUNNING TWICE AS FAST AS YOU CAN WALK". Also, vodka.

Anonymous said...

BobD, doesn't everything involve vodka?

By the way, did I ever tell you that my previous camera was named Bob?

Bob died. I now have Henry.

The Ambiguous Blob said...

Tee, even the great & powerful iPhone has limitations. It's camera could be better.

Mjenks, I'd appreciate a definition of that term. I am so NOT googling it myself.

BobD, The cool think about that was the fact that while I was running twice as fast as you walked, I was going the same exact speed. It kind of blows my mind but then, anything is possible with liquor. And it was wine, not vodka at that point in the evening.

External, you have very standard names for your electronic devices. What did you name your toaster?

Anonymous said...

But the important thing is that she's beautiful on the inside, right?

Right?

Sigh.

Anonymous said...

Were you both travelling in a straight line?

Tabbie, the camera is Henry because it's the red one. Had I gotten the same model in blue, it would have been Harry. And the previous camera just looked like a Bob, there was nothing I could do.

Oh, and the toaster's Hubert.

The Ambiguous Blob said...

Bad boy the idea of progress, ANYone with that deep of a cameltoe is just trying to prove something. I don't care how beautiful she is on the inside or out. I just care to know what the hell she was thinking.

External, I was sitting, so no. And I see your point about naming them. It totally makes sense in an alternate reality.

Scotty said...

Wow. I am envious you managed to get a pic off.

You're sure to get some crazy google searches. Guaranteed. I almost want to start searching for crazyness in hopes of landing on this here page.