Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Indicators of sleeplesness

Today, I am considering the need for friends.

So much of the time, I feel like having friends is more of a hassle than its worth. Friends hold me accountable to things. Being there for them during happy and sad times. Showing up to events that they give a shit about.

I didn't invite anyone to my own freaking wedding, for serious. Why do I have to show up to yours?

A few of my friends are super people-lovers. They often tell me- oh, you have to meet so and so. You'll love them!
And all I can think is- probably not. I'm chatty and friendly with people I meet generally, but it's not like I want to meet them for drinks later just to chat. I love talking to people and laughing and hearing their stories, but fuck. Then they want me to schlep out to their kid's party on a weekend when I could be vegging out, reading Odd Thomas.

But then. Then I remember that most of my good friends are incredible people. They hug me and ply me with xanex and wine when I'm broken and crying my eyes out. They take me on adventures and hand me toddlers to swing around with on dance floors at their birthday parties. They drop everything and take trips into wine country with me to play with cheetahs. And sometimes they even applaud after incredible singing of karaoke in their living rooms.

So I'll keep being friends with people for now. These ones are worth it, at least.

I fucking need a nap.


TC said...

I believe friends are vital for my mental health.

That said, the good ones. Meaning, wade through the bullshit, and cut out the losers. They aren't worth it. But the good ones? They're priceless... and worth attending birthday parties, weddings, and even dance recitals (shudder) for.

Memento Vivere said...

I hear yah! Been going through the same. Sometimes I find out too late who the good ones are. Sometimes I end with only a few good friends at any given time (most of them miles away) after wading through the bullshit.

But the few good ones are worth it. Just wish I had a teleport machine for the ones that are miles away.

Le Meems said...

Meeeeh. Fuck people.
Literally . Go get laid.

Rassles said...

I really only deal with cool people as a rule.

So at least you know you're a fucking winner.

Memento Vivere said...

Le Meems: good advice. Easier said than done...

Tee aka The Diva's Thoughts said...

I so love this post. I love having friends...just not the ones I have. I need new ones.