Monday, February 02, 2009

psychological warfare works

My mother never had much patience for children. She loved my sister and I with a fierceness matched only by mama bears, but just couldn't handle our immaturity. She had two of us at home to deal with and we weren't always easy to handle.

She wasn't into spankings or taking privileges away from us. She did try spanking us on one or two occasions (we ALWAYS got in trouble together- never one at a time) and we laughed at her wimpy swat and ran to our room.

Mom had to get creative to make us listen and STOP WHINING.

It started gradually- a hint here, a clue there. She was dropping stories about gypsies cleverly every time she could. After a little while- maybe a couple of months- of stories about how awful and evil gypsies are, she sprung the news on us.

The gypsies had moved into our town and were picking up all the bad kids once a day in front of the Safeway supermarket.

From then on, into our early adolescence, all mom had to say when we were being whiny little brats was "You want me to drop you off at Safeway?" and we'd be perfect little angels.

The thought of gypsies still scares me senseless. AND my mother can rightfully claim that my sister and I were always well-behaved as children. She made sure of it.


me said...

your mother is a smart lady.
sorry you're still scared of the gypsies though :)

catherinette said...

Must remember to share this story with my sister so she can try this out with her kids. No more having to threaten to call Santa...

TC said...

I met some gitanos (gypsies) in Spain... they were very nice :)

NWO said...

I once made out with a gypsie girl. I sorta wish they would come to town!

Ginormous Boobs said...

When gypsies invaded our home, it was no bueno!

The Ambiguous Blob said...

me, she is brilliant.

catherinette, Santa can totally suckit. It's the gypsies that will scare the lil tykes.

tc, I'm sure they were- you weren't a kid at the time, were ya?

nwo, I bet they kiss just fine. but then they torture your babies. just sayin.

GB, I about had fifteen heart attacks that night. Oh man, it still makes me panic a little. Must keep gypsies out of our home in the future.

Del-V said...

You are lucky to find a shopping cart at my Safeway much less a gypsie.

Rassles said...

I was definitely robbed by gypsies in Barcelona. So I busted their street scam. True story.

The Ambiguous Blob said...

Del-V, move out of the ghetto!

rassles, I think you're my hero.